Why do I need booze to talk to women? I do alright, if i get as much play as I do by spewing slurred lines in thick, stinky, beer breath... think about how many women would cry over me if they met me when I was sober. I am smart, witty, charming (I CAN BE!) You should see me right now! I am hot shit. My hair is touseled just so! I have this shirt on that really shows off my broad shoulders. I mean I AM SEXY! and I'm sure the Cobra troops (action figures!) that I've hidden all around my room have a big hard-on for me as they watch me from the shadows... but I don't care what they think, they are little bits of sculpted plastic stashed away in bookshelves and atop door frames. I want a woman. A woman who finds it cute that there are hidden cobra troops all integrated with the decorations of my room, that delights in looking for said troopers whilst in a lazy moment hanging out with me. Maybe I am holding her as I sleep, maybe she is holding me.

Unfortunately, I know how many women weep over me when I am sober: none. Because it is hard for a girl to notice the hot (and I mean HOT) guy who is across the city from them, in his room, with the door locked, posting a journal that no one will read.

Dear Imaginary reader, do not tell me to go meet women. Do not tell me to "ditch the booze." or slacken my usage of said crutch. I know how to solve the problem that I've explictly stated here. It's the problems that I can't articulate that have me confounded. If I was better at thinking on more than one level, if I knew what subtlety really was and could act accordingly, If I were not so defensive that I could accept and act on a solution, I would be better off. If I weren't so focused on "the best way," I would be a whole different personality type. For those of you I am imagining are curious, my personality type is: InTJ

So, there you have it, I probably could have said this better with the "lonely" emoticon, but what would be overly self-indulgent about that!?